Tuesday, September 19, 2006

drift away...

Last night was spent at poultry with emb friends. They had a drink of one or two but I opted for a soda. I had been drinking for almost four consecutive nights and vowed to stop for a while. I was a bit hesitant to come over but then I have nothing to do. And so I finally conceded to drop by poultry and spend the night with them. I went home past 10 already after having dinner with dj and shy at sinangag express along pedro gil. Bob and les went to meow to cap off the night. I bet they still are groggy up until this time.

It is really heart wrenching I may say that slowly I feel that bel is drifting away from me. She would not text me or call me in a day or two. She did not even bother to ask my number in my new office. I dunno know what is happening to us. I hope that what I am thinking is not coming into realization. I hate to say this but I don’t like what I feel every time I think about us and what will happen to us. Now that that she will be three months on the way, I don’t know what really are our plans. Every time I ask her about if she would marry me or when would she be transferring I always get blank answers and naughty smiles. Probably it’s because we don’t talk seriously and that we haven’t sat down yet for quite some time now. It started with that mother fucker buko pie thing. Whew…how could I bring back the times lost.

What I had in mind before was that if my transfer to my new office would materialize, I would definitely be a new person. I am slowly working on that and hope to accomplish it in the years to come. Nurturing they say. I thought also that she will be transferring but lately she was having doubts like it’s flooded, the area is humid and my place too high on the third floor. What can I say…I have yet to be rich and famous in order for me to give her needs.
Im sucked and screwed.

Please help me God.

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